Tuesday, January 25, 2011

5 Months

I began writing a post as a reflection of the past five months...the days since we first said hello to Aaron. As I read it back, it truly was a reflection of the past five months; a reflection of our grief and heartbreak. Yet, as I look back to that single day, August 25th, I decided that the post wasn't appropriate. It doesn't capture the feelings of that day at all. In fact, it was quite the opposite. 


Five months ago, today, was one of the happiest days of our lives. For a brief moment in time, we were able to forget that we were terrified...forget that we had spent the better part of the last year on our knees praying for a miracle...forget that our future as a family was completely uncertain.  Five months ago we heard the most beautiful cry and kissed the sweetest cheeks that were ever known to us. If only for a short few seconds, God graciously lifted our anxiety and fears and in that moment allowed us to experience unreserved pure love and pure joy...that of our son. He was perfect. And today, five months later, he is perfect...healthy and healed...perfect, as God planned.  We only wish that we could experience his healed body here on earth, rather than waiting for our eternity. 


I wonder so many things about you, Aaron Matthew. What you would look like, all the things you would now be doing, your personality? I wonder what you are doing now, what heaven is like, if you understand how much we miss you? Some day, Aaron. I know that we will have all these answers, and more importantly, that we will hold you once again...not nearly soon enough, but some day. Happy five month birthday, son. We miss you and love you more than you'll ever know sweet boy.   Love Always, Mommy & Daddy






...He said to them, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these...  ~Mark 10:14



8 comments:

  1. Beautiful words for a beautiful angel!

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  2. You are so blessed with ability to write and express yourself so beautifully. You remain in my thoughts and prayers!

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  3. Thinking of 5 months ago today also. What a joyful day with a beautiful baby! Always in our thoughts and prayers! love you xoxoxo

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  4. Thoughts and prayers are with you!

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  5. So, so beautiful, Danielle... Love to you...

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  6. I want to thank you for sharing your heart as well as your journey. You don't know me, but I've heard of your beautiful family's story through a friend that knows your mother (I believe). My husband and I lost our daughter Hannah Rose on September 19th. She was only 10 days old. I thank you for allowing the opportunity to grieve with you. The Lord brings so many people into our lives to help with the healing, and I know He brought you and Aaron into my life for just that reason. Praying our Lord continues to hold you and your husband so tight, and that the Lord would keep your precious son always in His company.

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  7. Beautiful post. I am with you - I believe that I will one day hold my sons again. Maybe Jake, Sawyer and Aaron are playing together. Take care.

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